Sh*t coaches say/do


#1

This thread is for any weird/stupid/funny comments or things you coaches have made in practice or at meets
Examples:
Coach “you guys get so much rest in between these intervals. You could do your homework in between these.”
Coach" go up to malachy and say ‘I must break you’"


#2

Coach: Champions are made when no one is looking. PEOPLE are made when no one is looking.
5 second pause
Everyone cracks up laughing
Coach: smh


#3

“Don’t post on running forums”


#4

Coach- “Alright, good practice today. Go home, shower, eat dinner, do your math homework, kiss your sister, and get your sleep.”

Me- “Coach, I don’t have a sister.”

Coach- most serious stare ever “Goal-oriented people find ways Ike.”


#5

when my grandpa was the AD at one of the downers schools, the xc coach put in a budget request one year for a scooter so he could keep tabs on his runners. Needless to say that didnt work out.


#6

that couldn’t have been coach Keogh. he celebrated his 50th birthday by running a sub 5 mile


#7

Hilarious.

-“Dont call me Mr. ____, he’s my father” “Ok Mr. _____”
-“Why did I get an email from the HC of Illinois State CC asking for a personal apology from you for ruining their programs image?”
-“Youre allergic to Bee’s? It seems that youre also allergic to A’s too!”
-“You cant vote for me for captain you moron”
-“When is your great Grandma going to die already…”


#8

I definitely want to know the story behind this one :smiley:


#9

You guys don’t want to run in the snow?? I used to pray for it to snow cause I knew my competition wouldn’t go out.


#10

I had a year where the distance coach got the job because she roomed with a girl the head coach dated once; she had never ran even a 5k. So if I thought hard, I could probably remember a whole bunch of fun conversations we had.

Coach - “I was really impressed by the effort of the guy behind you; he let it all out and collapsed at the line. Try to be more like that”

Me - “… he was behind me… but I can fall down too coach.”


#11

On prom: Coach- “Do you have a date for prom?” “yea” “Oh, did you ask a blind girl?”

On Rain: “Wear a jacket because tomorrow is going to be like a cow pissing on a flat rock”

On high jump mat covers: “Make sure you cover it up. Its not like any of you are going to be needing one anytime soon”

He also called stupid kids/stupid decision makers/lack of common sense on the team “fazuls”. Like as in pasta fazul, which is some type of bean soup. It made no sense, but was funny nevertheless.


#12

This blog is full of stuff like this: http://runningisxc.tumblr.com/